Exmark Lazer Z Lawn Mower, the Jalopnik Review

"Leadbull" (leadbull911)
04/29/2014 at 13:37 • Filed to: reviews, oppo reviews, jalopnik reviews

When I'm not sitting through college classes, I do maintenance work for my church. They recently moved me outside, which means I get to drive this thing.

(Full disclosure: I have nothing to disclose.)

It's a lot better than the Toro push mower I use at home, that's for sure. I suggest everyone buy one of these. Even if you don't have a large yard, just go out to the country and, like, mow some stuff. Just for the experience.

Exterior

It's red. It also looks a lot better when I'm on it HUR HUR HUR. But, overall, it's good, I guess?

Interior

There is no interior. Well, it does have a seat, which is pretty comfy.

Performance

It's got 27 horsepower, which is over twice that of !!!error: Indecipherable SUB-paragraph formatting!!! . Unfortunately, it doesn't have a transmission (or any aerodynamics, or any lightness), so it won't go twice the speed of Chris Harris's 2CV. If I'm misusing that apostrophe, I apologize. I'm too lazy to open up Purdue's OWL in another tab, so just deal with it, OK?

Handling

The ride is quite harsh, mostly because it has no front suspension. Drive too quickly over some rough ground, and your lower spine will very much regret it.

The real point of zero turn mowers like this one, though is nimbleness . There are two levers — one controls the left wheel; the other controls the right. Push forward, and it accelerates. Pull back, and the wheel will reverse direction.

Essentially, what this means is that you can spin around in perfect circles, like a top. Sure, it's practical, but who really cares about that?

Donuts!

Braking

There are no brakes. As noted before, you stop it by applying negative acceleration to the drive wheels. It stops quite well.

Toys

Uhhh... If you start to reverse, then quickly gun it forward, it'll pop a wheelie. That's a toy, right? That counts, I guess? Oh, it also has a sturdy bag to put trash in!

Kinja keeps putting my images way over to the left. I don't know why it does this, but it's super annoying. I'd like to jump down and start writing the conclusion, but I'm not sure if it'll let me hit enter ten times and not screw up the formatting. So I'm just going to continue building a useless wall of text and see how this works out. I need like two more lines. OK ,THIS IS THE LAST SENTENCE, I THINK. I don't know how you Jalopnik writers deal with this. It's insane. Edit: I need one more line. Another edit: I think I need another line, actually.

Overall impressions

Push mowing is stupid. This is 'MERICA, and you have a constitutional right to buy one of these. I suggest you take advantage of that right.

Photo credit: me, and definitely not a professional photographer of any sort

DISCUSSION (29)

Brian, The Life of > Leadbull
04/29/2014 at 13:44

Every 12 year-old boy on Earth wishes he had a yard big enough for a riding lawnmower.

I still wish I had a yard big enough for a riding lawnmower.

/forever 12

PS9 > Leadbull
04/29/2014 at 13:46

Toys: 0/10

'Lazer' lawnmower does not now with lazers? Doesnt actually have a single lazer anywhere??? FALSE ADVERTISING FAIL

Leadbull > Brian, The Life of
04/29/2014 at 13:46

I thought you SoCal people filled your yards with rocks.

Brian, The Life of > Leadbull
04/29/2014 at 13:48

A LOT of people still have lawns.

You're thinking of Arizona.

Leadbull > PS9
04/29/2014 at 13:49

Kinja'd!!!

I hear there's a large aftermarket for that type of thing.

Jcarr > Leadbull
04/29/2014 at 13:49

I worked for a lawn care company in college and used one of these daily. You're right about the wheelie thing.

There was one morning where we were at our shop waiting for some rain to pass and we decided we'd do a drag race between the Exmark and a similarly-sized John Deere zero-turn. When the "flag" dropped I jammed the controls on the Exmark forward and just about shit my pants as the front wheels rose what felt like 3 feet off the ground.

Didn't bend or break the frame, though.

Übel > Leadbull
04/29/2014 at 13:50

As someone who also has a zero-turn, all of my best lawn-mowing moments have been with popping a wheelie. I've inadvertently done some pretty big ones.

Leadbull > Brian, The Life of
04/29/2014 at 13:51

To the rest of the country, it's all "that place down there with palm trees".

The rest of the country is only jealous.

Leadbull > Jcarr
04/29/2014 at 13:53

There should be a sanctioned racing series.

Leadbull > Übel
04/29/2014 at 13:54

Ever popped one going up a hill?

I 'bout pooped my pants...

Übel > Leadbull
04/29/2014 at 13:56

I 'bout pooped my pants reading that. Holy shit that would be terrifying. We have a rather large, steep slope in our front yard, but I've managed to keep all of my wheels planted whilst going up it.

7:07 > Leadbull
04/29/2014 at 13:57

Walker or nothing*

Leadbull > 7:07
04/29/2014 at 13:59

We have one of those, too. Very tricky, to say the least.

Leadbull > Übel
04/29/2014 at 14:01

We have a 30-something inch walk behind for steep hills, but it's been in the shop with a carburetor issue.

I now see why we have a walk behind for steep hills.

PS9 > Leadbull
04/29/2014 at 14:03

And void my warranty? NO THANK YOU. I'll be reporting this false advertising to the BBB. Next time, I'm sticking with my Corolla mower.

Übel > Leadbull
04/29/2014 at 14:12

We've just got the zero turn. The worst part is trying to mow around the tree we have growing on said slope, since things tend to get a little slippy when managing tight turns.

dinobot666 > Leadbull
04/29/2014 at 14:17

Jalop review of the year!

Leadbull > Übel
04/29/2014 at 14:34

Yeah, I'd just not bother with it, and weed eat the area around the tree.

BJ > Brian, The Life of
04/29/2014 at 20:22

Those boys didn't lose the best summers of their youth endlessly mowing acres and acres of grass...

As much as I like tractors and driving and machines and shredding random items left on the lawn with a 3-blade deck, I just can't stand the smell of cut grass mixed with the oily exhaust from a 2-stroke motor. I have an electric mower for my small urban lawn, and even that's a bit much sometimes. My wife does most of the mowing.

Scarred, I am.

Brian, The Life of > BJ
04/29/2014 at 20:48

Fair enough for the "familiarity breeds contempt" factor ;)

thebigbossyboss > Leadbull
05/04/2014 at 21:01

I used to use a 13.5 HP john deere tractor...this little thing has 27 hp??? Holy man!!!

eXmark > Leadbull
09/18/2014 at 16:17

Great article! We take pride in our mowers and are glad you had a great experience. We would love to see some videos of poppin wheelies! If you get that video going, we would love to see it and go ahead and send it to us at exmarkdigitalmarketing@gmail.com. Also, if anyone wants to check out our mowers visit us at http://www.exmark.com/ .

eXmark > Leadbull
09/18/2014 at 16:17

Leadbull > eXmark
09/18/2014 at 16:50

I love you.

Roundbadge > thebigbossyboss
09/18/2014 at 16:54

No kidding. I thought the 14 HP my Dixon ZTR had in 1990 was a lot.

Jordaneer, The Mountaineer Man > Leadbull
09/18/2014 at 23:36

I mow my grandparents yard with a push mower, okay it's self-propelled, and their lawn is over an acre, so this would be epic to mow with.

Leadbull > Jordaneer, The Mountaineer Man
09/19/2014 at 00:25

But you've got heart, man.

Your boy, BJR > eXmark
09/19/2014 at 15:07

You guys fucking rule for this. I'm about to be in the market for a ride on mower and this put you at the top of the list.

orcim > Leadbull
09/20/2014 at 03:04

Oh, yes. And I've dumped my Fastrak 18 HP Honda Twin 44" deck into a hole which was my worst experience.

Kinja'd!!!

The weeds on the lip of an impending pond had overgrown in weeds, and I got too close. Over the lip I went, with the mower pearling (surf term) into the bottom and then flipping up and 'ov to land basically upside down. Blades going, engine at high, I got the chance to hit he ignition, bail as it was in the air, land, turn, and watch said awesome 4 cycle machine leak oil out of all orifices upside down in the future pond. No, even adrenalized strength didn't help to right it as they build those things of heavy steel. Poopie pants was a minor body side event.